I recently experienced my first real stripper experience at a bachelorette party. It’s not difficult to guess why it was my responsibility to book the male stripper…. Let me just say, it was not easy finding one, in fact, I had to specify whether I wanted a male, female, two females, fat stripper, or a midget; and then once I found a reliable company, I had to specify whether I wanted a white, latino or african american man. I did not realize that people have racial preferences for strippers.
The night was interesting. Many of the girls were apprehensive about having a male stripper, but once they realized that strippers are people too, they were a bit more welcoming.
I understand and respect that many people are not comfortable with being around a male or female stripper, but one would think if it makes an individual uncomfortable, they’d simply excuse themselves from the room.
I was totally blown away when one girl said,
“I’m not going to feel bad about making a stripper feel bad, he’s a stripper.”
It was then that I realized, if that one woman felt that he wasn’t worthy of having feelings because of his occupation, then other women must feel this way too. People are very judgmental of careers regarding anything sexually related.
In my career, especially as a sex expert, I’ve realized that people are judgmental of what they don’t understand, or are too insecure to do themselves.
Sexuality is ambiguous in general, but it’s clear that it is a part of our culture whether we like it or not. However, whether we choose to accept different aspects of it, and the topic of sex in general, depends on the preconceived notions of sexuality that we’re raised with, which are difficult to alter as adults.
I found myself very defensive of this gentleman. Sure, being a male dancer isn’t seen as the most respectable job, or socially acceptable one, but it’s a job, it’s certainly not easy, and it makes money.
After meeting Rob* I asked him if he’d be willing to do an interview for Honestly Naked, and this is what happened–>
Tell me a little about you, what is your age, where you grew up and what is your dream job?
Ok I am 27, I grew up in central jersey born in north jersey, and have beach house in jersey. So yea I am a jersey guy! I would say my dream job would be a professional athlete!
When did you start stripping?
I started dancing a couple of years ago it was April 2012 I remember like it was yesterday.
Do you prefer being called a stripper/entertainer/male dancer/ other?
ah any of those names are fine but being called entertainer sounds great cause I work so hard to keep girls entertained and take pride in the job.
What made you become a male dancer?
lol man where do I start with this one… Well me and my family have a beach house right next to AC and I knew that AC is a bachelor and bachelorette head quarters… I also remembered growing up people would tell me I should go for stripping and was offered to dance in Philly. Because I stayed in shape and danced well. So, since I’m so adventurous I googled male strip clubs in AC… my company popped up I called them, they told me to come down for an interview… I went down and there was no interview, I was thrown to the wolves my first day!! It was very interesting I was a little nervous but more excited if any thing when I saw the stardom and women!
What is your full-time job?
What I do full-time, I am a soldier in the Army National Guard and work for the State as Medical Security officer… Plus with the military I am getting deployed really soon.
What is the best part about being a male dancer?
There are 3 things…Money, attention, and women. Most guys, when they go out to AC, they usually spend a ton of money… But when I go out and party with girls I make money instead haha.
But for real there is nothing like when I make a girl smile, the most sexiest curve on a woman’s body is her smile.
What is the worst part about being a male dancer?
Worst part is ? When I was doing the male review show and work with some jealous knuckle heads… Guys would get jealous talk shit when your making too much money.. You have to worry about someone stealing your money at the male review. Don’t get me wrong male review shows are a lot of fun but you have to deal with a bunch of politics and guys getting jealous. But now I don’t do shows any more, I only do private parties now.
Considering your sexuality, do you only get calls for all female private parties or do you sometimes get all male parties?
Interesting question, I have never got a call for a male client they have always been for females… I also always ask who is it for? If lets say it were a guy no i would not do the party. Our company is generally for women. But if a guy is part of the bachelorette party they would let it slide. But a group a guys they would not.
If you’ve done a male party, how did you feel? If you haven’t, would you?
No I would not do it haha.. No offense, I just would not be comfortable.
How do you handle your own personal love relationships?
Well I am currently single now but I have been dating around… But nothing really serious yet, it’s just been really complicated with me going away, my wild job, and me being so adventurous.
Do you tell your partners that you’re a male dancer?
It’s usually as I get to know them then I would tell them what I do, sometimes their ok with it sometimes not… I also met a lot women from this job so they know what I do. But eventually they tried to talk me out of it. It’s been a great ride and an awesome way of meeting women.
How do they feel about it?
Sometimes they are ok, and some are not ! But eventually they tried to get me out of it.
Has anyone ever broken up with you because of your profession?
Yes, it has happened and kind of sucks. Or they do only a one night stand… Because they don’t want to be in a relationship cause of my profession. That’s what they view me and use me as a one night stand. Not saying its bad, but it gets old.
How do your partners usually react?
I had some partners be really been over protective in which I could understand, some are are really laid back with it as long as I would come to them at the end of the night.
Many people are uncomfortable with the idea of strippers, has anyone ever made you feel uncomfortable or disrespected you while on a job?
When I tell people usually what I do usually they think its awesome or funny, you , “way to go stud you’re the man” or “wow that’s awesome good for you.” I would say positive for most part, but few girls put it down a few times negative like wow you must be a player or been with lots of girls. But overall positive feedback. While in the job overall positive feedback there has been few negative people but everyone has there own theory or is going to judge… But I have tough skin I don’t let that bother me, I look at it as part of the job. You know do most pro athletes, celebrities, or politicians got say they are number 1 and making money and people still judge them no matter what… It is what it is !
Do you plan to be a male dancer for the rest of your life?
Do I plan on being a dancer for the rest of my life ! No why this is a young mans game I will do it while I am young man.
If and when you get married, will you tell your future partner that you were once a male dancer? what about children?
I think eventually I will tell her, but my kids I am not sure maybe when they are older and mature enough.
What’s your work out regiment?
Well I change it up all the time to make sure I don’t hit a plateau…I work out at the gym 5 to 6 times a week. Also depending on the mood I’m in I would lift weights, cardio, I participate in Mix Martial Arts, Boxing, and I like to stay active overall. But my favorite are calisthenics, which means beautiful strength, you know pull ups, push ups, and anything that consists of body weight.
Besides the money, what is the best part of the job?
It gives me adrenaline rush, you might never know what’s going to happen who you’re going to meet, and you feel like a celebrity. When the women treat me like there golden boy or when a woman hugs me and says thank you for making my party special. It’s the attention I get, its like Euphoria to me.
Has the job ever led to sex with a client? or a relationship?
Yes it has for both parties… Just a great way to meet women but not the best when it comes to relationships.
Do people hire you for one to one shows?
Never had that, always been birthday parties or my bachelorette’s usually.
What was your first show like?
First show lol it’s funny… I thought it was going to be an interview or just to check it out… But instead he made me work I was a little nervous but more excited… I was one of the massage guys. My manager gave me a nick name. I did not know what was gonna happen, but I talked to some of the guys and the manager they told me in here we are Gods… I just followed the guys watched them how they would pick up Toss the girls. I would watch how they would grind with them. I just followed there lead. Hey I learned from the best. The girls were really into it in which is good but I couldn’t believe how raunchy some girls were acting. But hey at least they liked us.
Any great stories for me?
I have plenty, but one time I was doing a private party in Tropicana dressed up as hotel security. The girls knew I was coming but not the bachelorette … So when the girls got me to their room I acted all of them were in trouble, I ask to see ids, I told them they woke up the old people next door, I asked if there was any drugs at all. So the bachelorette started crying saying she was clean, I’m innocent etc. Of course then I calmed her down and made her happy later.
What was the worst experience you’ve ever had as a male dancer?
Not sure . Maybe I had one bad party where the girls were really ugly and not into it. But that’s rare.
What do your parents think about you being a male dancer? Do they know?
For the longest time they did not know, but finally they found out. They weren’t too fond of it, they just didn’t like I kept a secret from them. But my rest of my family had a kick of it and thought it was funny.
How often do people ask you to get naked? Does it cost more?
Yea sometimes they will ask me to get naked, really were not supposed to but if they really want to I would charge them.